If you ask me about my life, and ask if I have regrets, I will be pretty quick to acknowledge that I have regrets, I’m working on being OK with “me.” I have made plenty of mistakes! I’ve been reckless and thoughtless, silly and some other unflattering descriptions. I used to think that mistakes automatically equated with regrets. On my personal path, however, I am learning to take responsibility for the actions oh and let me not forget those little or maybe big inactions of my past, to make peace with myself and others, and then to simply let go.
I’m coming to see life as this big journey–the past is there for a reason, a stepping stone to teach me a “bigger” lesson. It simply HAD to be that way so that I can be who I am now and who I will become in the future. I’ve learned lessons, yes, but I don’t need to live with major regrets. I believe here are no accidents or happenstance — everything is intricately woven and occurs for a reason. Sometimes I have no *earthly* idea what the reason is, but I know there is a plan in the Universe and I am a part of the plan. I can trust that all things (including the past) are working together for good. And so, regrets can seem like a waste of energy to me.
But then, I started thinking on a smaller scale. While I see past “mistakes” as stepping stones, what about the “little” things in life that I have missed? I DO have regrets! I regret certain things … what haven’t I said or done that I needed to? What about not calling that friend or visiting my dad right before he died because I was feeling too bad or just too busy, or not saying “I love you” to someone, or not taking an afternoon to have a long lunch with a friend? What about not offering a hug when it is needed?
I need to start living today, do you? Why don’t we all make a conscious effort to begin REALLY LIVING today? I propose we share our TRUE hearts with people. I propose we knock down the walls that separate our egos from our spirit and we share ourselves with love. I propose we live spontaneously and let our hearts be our guiding lights.
What will I do differently? I have started to make some changes but more are needed and will come as I fight my battles. I will take each day as it comes and accept it for what it brings me and I will be more at Peace with myself today than I was yeterday for today is a new day and yesterday is the past. Is this easy no but it is necessary for me today and for many days to come.
August 23rd, 2006 at 4:07 pm
That first paragraph could be me too, unless it said anything about wearing womens clothes.
We all have to make adjustments sometimes with the times or even take a few steps back to get on a path you strayed from.
Whatever it is as long as you know and understand your goals then you are going in the right direction.
August 23rd, 2006 at 9:35 pm
For me, my regrets are also little things. All the little things are what make up most of our lives.
Your post just made my mind up for me. One of our local blogers has cancer and she is going for sergery tommorrow. Following that she wont be able to have children. She isnt just fighting cancer, but also a future without children of her own, and I know you can relate to the later. I was toying with the idea of going to visit her in hospital. You just made be see that I cant not go see her. Put aside my shyness and do whats right. The hospital is an hour away from me, but I always enjoy a drive anyways. you can visit her if you like by clicking on THE RACE in my links.
Thanks for the inspiration!
August 23rd, 2006 at 10:29 pm
Amen, we do need to live for today and concentrate on what we can do today. If we focus too much on tomorrow and the future, we’ll become overwhelmed and frustrated. You are taking the right approach.
I have made mistakes as well, no one is getting out of this life without making any. Mistakes are how we learn and if we focus on the regrets, it only brings us down. Regrets cannot be changed but they can be let go. If we didn’t have regrets, what would make us want to improve and not make the mistakes again? They are a part of lives but we shouldn’t dwell too long on them.
You are making such strides and again, I’m proud of you. Even the slightest change is difficult but not so difficult when it will make your life better and these changes will.
You are one awesome and incredible woman and I am blessed to have you in my life. *BIG HUGS* LOVE YOU!
August 23rd, 2006 at 10:33 pm
I continue to make mistakes and occasionally mull opportunities lost; nonetheless, I accept what comes my way, since it’s my hand on the tiller, and that is the reality of it: whatever responsibility or irresponsibility comes my way, I’m responsible for it, period
August 23rd, 2006 at 10:54 pm
each day is a journey within. take care and find your peace. poet
August 23rd, 2006 at 11:52 pm
YOu are a very wise person. I tend to see the bad and the good as life lessons, yet need to make more decisions to maximize the positive and downplay the negative in my life. I don’t think I could get much more opne than I am though. I would have to walk around naked.
August 24th, 2006 at 12:09 am
If you mean things I could have affected the outcome of, then yes I have some regrets and there are some things I would do differently if I had the chance to do them again. But as others have said, these are learning experiences. If you mean things in general by regrets, then there is one big one I wish I could reverse but I can’t so have to find a way to live with it.
It is good to live each day for itself but I think it also does make sense to make some plans & have some things to look forward to. What we do can & does have an effect on our future and good planning can help make that future brighter.
August 24th, 2006 at 1:38 am
Regret can be such an issue. I was estranged from my mom for 2 yrs. We’re talking again and closer than ever, but I don’t want to waste time regretting what we lost. Instead of regretting time wasted, I call her more often, email all the time, and try to make the future better than the past has been. This was a lovely, spiritual post.
August 24th, 2006 at 7:09 am
Nope I found out once and for all I have two regrets in my life…and I also have a lot of living left to do. I’m gonna do it…I’m like you, I’ve decided to take advantage of each day that I’m blessed with.
Have a good day, friend.
August 24th, 2006 at 8:31 am
Is there a single person on this earth who does not regret something about their life? We all make mistakes in our life and must accept that and hopefully move forward in a better way.
August 24th, 2006 at 12:00 pm
Show me someone who is no longer making mistakes, and I’ll show you someone who is NO LONGER BREATHING! ~ jb///
August 24th, 2006 at 12:58 pm
Love and special blessings to you and thanks for your visit.
I am very lonely since my Mom has passed away and my son just flew back to Asia.
I need lots of cyber hugs until my husband gets home.
Love Jeanne
X0×0
August 24th, 2006 at 9:07 pm
Every “mistake” I made has brought me to something or someone that I am thrilled with, so it is like it was part of the plan, you know? Like if my jackass ex-husband wouldn’t have let me, I would have never started blogging. Believe me, some days this logic doesn’t work for me either, but I really try. Hang in there sweet heart.
August 24th, 2006 at 9:35 pm
In 1968 Frank Sinatra recorded My Way. I have to agree with these lyrics:
Regrets, I’ve had a few
But then again, too few to mention
I did what I had to do
and saw it through without exemption
I planned each charted course,
each careful step along the byway
And more, much more than this,
I did it my way
August 25th, 2006 at 10:34 am
My thoughts and prayers are with you..
A big Amen to this post…
I need to start living too..
Huge hugs
Love you sweetie!
August 25th, 2006 at 10:44 am
Hi Vickie ~~A great post and a great idea for us all to stop regretting our mistakes and start living as they say
“in the moment”. Live for today !! Thanks for yur comments on my log. Keep smiling and keep enjoying the life you live. Take gentle care Vickie, Hugs, Merle.
August 25th, 2006 at 11:57 am
Despite the many mistakes I have made I am glad of where I am now.
Too bad that life is so short! I won’t be nearly where I would like to be when i finally shuffle off this mortal coil!
August 25th, 2006 at 5:08 pm
“I’m working on being OK with “me.”
Interesting… I also realized lately that I am not always ok with myself. And sometimes there is probably no reason for it.
But it also feels to me that you need to feel OK with yourself before you can start making changes to improve yourself even more. There needs to be a sound basis for such a difficult task.
August 29th, 2006 at 12:47 pm
“I propose we share our TRUE hearts with people. I propose we knock down the walls that separate our egos from our spirit and we share ourselves with love. ”
It’s only when one allows for these doors to truly open up that one can truly love…and live life in the now with full acceptance of the present blessings.
August 31st, 2006 at 6:23 am
Sorry for taking so long to stop by again. I’m just getting caught up on my blog reading.
August 31st, 2006 at 6:36 am
Oops, how did that get posted?…lol. I found myself writing too long of a comment and decided to make a post out of it on my site instead (referencing your post, of course). Then when I came back to finish commenting on here, I see the partial comment got tired of waiting for me and posted itself.
Anyway…
This is a wonderful piece, Vickie! I’m glad you were so gracious to share your food (for thought) with us, because it really did feed me. Thanks!
September 3rd, 2006 at 10:27 am
A little of my food for thought
Hi Vickie
I love this post. I am glad that you have started living today. Maybe you could let me use it on my website, surewoman.com. Please check out the site. Again, I love this post. Keep writing. dawn