Happiness | Filed under General
Over the course of my life’s journey I have come to realize that happiness is much more something we must choose then something that simply comes and goes according to random events or obstacles that are thrown our way in life.
In the past I found myself under the illusion that if I attained certain goals, or succeeded at certain things then happiness would follow–which in the short term I’ll concede that it often did.
The problem with this is that I was often left chasing my next batch of happiness, as though it were something that I could only have for short intervals in between accomplishments. The problem was that over time I realized that I wanted more–I wanted to feel joy on a more consistent basis. I didn’t want it to be something I had to continuously chase after. In other words I wanted the kind of happiness that didn’t require me to attain something in order to have the feeling.
Fortunately I’ve come to the realization that for the most part I can choose to be happy on a daily basis. In order to do this at times it may even mean faking it–better yet, forcing the feelings until the genuine happiness and gratitude sets in.
I’ve found that something as simple as smiling can do wonders to help me see that I have in me the ability to choose to be happy.
I believe one of the best things we can do is to live in the moment–it does wonders when it comes to cultivating a life filled with ongoing happiness. Taking the time to reflect on and be grateful for the things we have accomplished can also have an enormous impact when it comes to lifting our moods.
I’d strongly encourage you to take breaks during the day to ponder those happy memories that you’ve collected in your life and make it a point to build new ones as well.
I believe it is also worth noting that sometimes in life we are just going to feel down. People are going to do things that disappoint or hurt us. We are going to have our hearts broken and we’re going to have to deal with all sorts of loss. Life is not all smiles unfortunately.
However, while I believe we have to acknowledge that some days are filled with sadness — I don’t believe it does us any long-term good to spend any length of time dwelling on them, in doing so we are only giving power to things that we have no control over. Instead remind yourself that you are making the choice to choose happiness.
Deciding to move forward and choosing happiness over sorrow is a tough choice. Sometimes you may feel as though you are fighting an uphill battle. At other times it will seem that the dark clouds may never give way to the sunshine. It is at those very moments that we have to remind ourselves that somewhere amidst whatever chaos may surround us — we still have the choice to decide on happiness.
Practice making this choice by doing things that make you smile, as well as bring joy to others. When you share kindness it always finds its way back to you.
May your life be filled with much happiness so that you will know just what I mean when you hear me say Life Is Simply Good. Remember Life holds no promises as to what will come your way. You must search for your own ideals and work toward reaching them. Life makes no guarantees as to what you’ll have. It just gives you time to make choices and to take chances and to discover whatever secrets that might come your way. If you are willing to take the opportunities you are given and utilize the abilities you have, you will constantly fill your life with special moments and unforgettable times.
September 10th, 2005 at 11:41 pm
My viewpoint is similar. Happiness is subjective. You can find happiness even in the more somber momemts. My previous comment about mtyfiancee’, Glenda, in an earlier post is an example. The sad thing is she was taken from me by the hepatitis in December of last year. But my happiest memories are when she experienced happiness herself. I draw good memories from the times when she was either smiling or crying tears of joy, many from the times I did something that pleased her or brought her joy, and evade the memories that might bring me pain or sorrow. You can be happy even in trying times if you remember the more happy moments and refrain from dwelling on the depressing stuff. Sure, I miss Glenda, but she is hopefully dwelling in a better place where the pain she suffered from the disease no longer bothers her. And I get to leave posts like this on the Web which will last even after I’ve passed on to that eternity.
Once more I will quote that which was written by a better writer than I’ll ever be:
Happiness cannot come from without. It must come from within. It is not what we see and touch or that which others do for us which makes us happy; it is that which we think and feel and do, first for the other fellow and then for ourselves.
-Helen Keller
I am enjoying your posts. You are very insightful.
September 11th, 2005 at 6:36 am
I’ve said more than once that happiness isn’t an address where you reside and receive mail. It comes it goes, and you make as much of it as can for yourself……..most insightful and beautifully written post Vickie
September 11th, 2005 at 6:56 am
Wonderful thought to ponder Vic. I’ve always figured a good way to start is to ‘want’ what you already have.:grin:
September 11th, 2005 at 8:48 am
Beautifully written and so true.
I used to chase the illusive happiness dream, thinking that what I didn’t have would make me happy. In recent years I came to the same conclusion as yourself, maybe this is something that comes as we grow in maturity and wisdom.
I have learned to be happy with myself, content with my life and enjoy what I do have instead of dwelling on what I don’t have. And I am thankful for the blessings in my life.
September 11th, 2005 at 9:06 am
Hey, you, yes, you lovely Miss Victoria…I took this post to heart today along with your advice.
Thank you, Sweetie, I love you, friend.
September 11th, 2005 at 9:10 am
I sure needed this reminder, so thank you. Positive feelings and happy memories can get us through the rough times. You’re an inspiration… as always!
LOVE & HUGS!
September 11th, 2005 at 10:53 am
When I stopped trying to be happy, and settled for content, I found that the happiness I sought was in being content with what I had been given. No more trying, just contentment.
September 11th, 2005 at 11:30 am
I’ve had a similar thought process going on recently. I moan and groan about working with my co-stylist (whom I dearly love as a friend, for the record), but I was letting myself become affected by it to the point I was contiunally in a grumpy mood — even when I started my morning out as happy as could be. I decided to grin and bear it (as much as possible) when she sprints in daily 30 & 40 minutes late. I’ve even made myself go in late to show her not to depend on me to cover for her. It doesn’t change anything, but at least it provides some amusement for me now as opposed to letting it drag me down.
Nicely done.
September 11th, 2005 at 11:40 am
Love these posts Vickie! I was going to say what someone else already did…. but I do live by this so it’s a part of me ~~ Happiness comes not from without, but from within. Being human, in trying times I tend to forget this little gem at first, then when I remember I know what to do…I start by counting my blessings and work from there. Yes, they’ll always be hardships and hurt in our lives, but the key is to finding that silver lining that every single cloud has…..
Much love to you, my friend!
September 11th, 2005 at 12:37 pm
Thanks for making me smile today!
September 11th, 2005 at 12:58 pm
That’s good advice. Smiling makes two people happy.
September 11th, 2005 at 3:20 pm
I never fail to feel deep happiness when I see a spontaneous smile from a child. That one smile keeps me smiling all day. And, then, of course “our” Julie makes me smile just being around her. :):smile:
September 11th, 2005 at 5:27 pm
Excellent post, Vickie !!
So, well said !! *HUGS*
September 11th, 2005 at 5:29 pm
I always loved the saying that goes ” its not getting what you want, its wanting what you have.”
I can honestly say that I want what I have and I am glad I have it. When ever I feel down I count my blessings and soon I don’t feel down at all!
When some one makes me angry I thank god that I care enough about that person and they care enough about me to make me mad!
Andger and frustration and depression are wonderful emotions to have. They make Joy, Happines and satisfaction that much better:)
Love ya soul sister:bananadance:
September 11th, 2005 at 11:54 pm
Seeing this great post what comes to mind is this: What is the secret of real happiness? Power, authority, victory or longevity?
Sultan of Spain Abd ur Rahman III has been quoted as saying, “I have ruled for fifty years with triumph. My subordinates always held me in high esteem and enemies were terrified. Wealth, respect, and pleasure were at my disposal. But critical evaluation reveals that there were only fourteen days that I spent in real bliss. They too were blemished some how.
Human are in search of answer to this question since inception. Considered deeply, is it not correct that all the questions stand replied by this sole experience?
Have I been able to convey the point?