Fault-Finding | Filed under General
It’s easy to find fault in things–far too easy for most of us. Somehow, the flaws are far more easy to see than the bigger picture, than the amount of work and thought and preparation have gone into a particular piece of work. Think about it-Many of us carry this tendency to extremes, though. Many people feel that they need to tell everyone about every little fault that they find in every situation. They feel that they’re doing people favors by pointing out what they see as flaws and problems, even though they may not be in a position in which people expect them to find mistakes. And when they do so, they risk hurting people greatly at any price and no matter what is going on.
Another reason why we do not regard others as precious is that we pay attention to their faults whilst ignoring their good qualities. Unfortunately we have become very skilled in recognizing the faults of others, and we devote a great deal of mental energy to listing them, analyzing them, and even meditating on them! With this critical attitude, if we disagree with our partner or colleagues about something, instead of trying to understand their point of view we repeatedly think of many reasons why we are right and they are wrong. By focusing exclusively on their faults and limitations we become angry and resentful, and rather than cherishing them we develop the wish to harm or discredit them. In this way small disagreements can easily turn into conflicts that simmer for months. Fault-finding and criticizing, no matter what our intentions, tend to drive wedges between us and other people. A person who finds fault in everything is a person to be avoided, when all is said and done, and who among us wants other people to avoid us whenever they can?
Right now there is so much finger pointing and fault-finding going on when we need to be pulling together and supporting those who have lost so much and need so much. There will come a time when it is appropriate to begin investigation, pointing fingers but it will be when all lives have been saved and some sort of normal routine has returned but it is not now.
I would like to thank the many who supported me in my effort to raise money as I took part in the Blogging for Hurricane Relief. At this time with the help of many we have raised $650.00. Tomorrow my post will focus more on this but for now I wish to say Thank you and each one of you know who you are. I appreciate this more than you imagine.
My days of whining and complaining about others have come to an end.
Nothing is easier than fault-finding. All it will do is discolor my personality
so that none will want to associate with me. That was my old life. No more.
Og Mandino
September 5th, 2005 at 9:47 pm
I could not agree with you more Ms. Vickie - I can’t believe what we, the American people, have become. Yes, we all fall short of the Glory of God; we all make mistakes and we must live with those mistakes. But, to intentionally find fault with others when we were not there, personally, to see, to know exactly what happened is unbelievable to me. I can’t help but be upset that more attention is not drawn to the needs than to the drama by people in a position to help rather than condemn.
I’m proud of you and your efforts. God bless you! You’re my kind of person, and I am delighted and honored to be a friend.
September 5th, 2005 at 11:17 pm
I try not to look at other peoples faults because I have enough of my own. I wouldn’t want mine being pointed out, not that I really give a shit if they did. But they are my faults and they do make me who I am and everyone who knows me and is still with me accepts that fact.
We are not perfect and all of us have faults, it’s how we get around them that matters.A person who finds faults in other people all the time has a big fault right there and is maybe hiding his/her own faults.
In times of tragety there is no place for looking for faults but action is what is required. Later it can be examined and steps should be taken to avert the situation from reacuring or minimizing the effect.
There will always be fault in accidents and misjudgements but there has to be lessons learned and plans put in place to prevent them from happening again.
Hows that I woke up to your post and now I’m off to bed after your latest post.
Good night.
September 6th, 2005 at 1:31 am
I don’t see faults in other people, except when my friend Alice makes a Beaver face, because it makes her look like a Beaver, but that’s ok.
Hi Vickie!
September 6th, 2005 at 5:18 am
Yes, the easiest thing is finding faults in others. What is more, any one may be having the same fault and would not realize during whole life but still may be too quick to quick to point out the same when seen in others. That is shallowness or is it an effort to hide own faults? I suggest we should all look at our
September 6th, 2005 at 5:33 am
Great post Victoria!
September 6th, 2005 at 5:52 am
Here is my complete comment: Yes, the easiest thing is finding faults in others. What is more, any one may be having the same fault and would not realize during whole life but still may be too quick to quick to point out the same when seen in others. That is shallowness or is it an effort to hide own faults? I suggest we should all look at our selves, identify own faults and try to purge those. No?
September 6th, 2005 at 6:32 am
It is way too easy to find faults in others, and you’re right we need to look deeper to find the good things. It also, as you said, discolors us. You’ve got an incredible attitude, thanks for sharing it because it is rubbing off.
Love you! *HUGS*
September 6th, 2005 at 9:21 am
Between yourself and Walker, you’ve said it best!! I agree wholeheartedly with you Vickie, and although I wish it would stop, there will always be those with negative attitudes. This is a time for the rest of mankind to ignore them and just get on with the business of helping where help and compassion are so badly needed! Congratulations to you and those who contributed ~ $650.00 will help a lot! When I donated to the American Red Cross it seemed such a small amount (but all I could do) but you know what? ……I felt good doing SOMETHING instead of looking where to place blame. Compassion overrules negativity in my books! Great post my Soul Lady….you are one in a million you know.
September 6th, 2005 at 2:47 pm
I agree that it is so easy to find faults in others. We need to work on that. Not just one person, but all of us !
Great post, Vickie !!! I am glad that I stop here often. Your posts always makes me think and makes me have a more positive attitude !! *HUGS*:thumbsup::heart::bananadance:
September 6th, 2005 at 5:02 pm
Hey girl, the old saying “you can always find something wrong if you look for it”
September 6th, 2005 at 9:17 pm
I had a manager once who taught me something early in my career. If we complained about something in a staff meeting, that was the fastest way to be assigned to come up with a solution. We learned we’d better have an answer to any issue we brought up — or keep our trap shut.
If your not part of the solution, you must be part of the problem.
September 6th, 2005 at 10:20 pm
I know that most folks already know what their faults are, and therefore don’t need them pointed out to them consistantly anyhow.
You’re right, full on. We need to quit trying to find faults and get on with helping people out rather than bringing them down.
September 7th, 2005 at 6:37 am
You are so right! Whining and complaining about others reveals more about the one speaking than their intended target.
September 7th, 2005 at 7:43 am
Victoria,
The trouble with you is. . . Ha, just kidding. I couldn’t agree more and Og Mandino is one of my favorites. Also, I believe the Bible mentions taking the mote out of your own eye before trying to remove the mote from the eye of your brother.
When I get to harping on other people I wind up looking at myself and realize I am only seeing my own shortcomings more clearly in someone else.
September 7th, 2005 at 7:46 am
Too many people in America need to read this post. They point fingers at Bush and have done nothing to help. Good post.