Choices | Filed under General
I often talk about the choices we make in life well I am going to talk about it one more time and I don’t promise it will be my last one either. How often have you regretted a choice that you’ve made because it’s turned out badly and you or someone else has suffered considerably as a consequence of a choice that you’ve made? How often have you seen friends or family members or other loved ones–or even total strangers, for that matter–make choices that you knew were going to be harmful to that person and to others, but they’ve gone ahead and made the choice, against all advice? It happens quite often, doesn’t it?
Once a choice is made, any other possible choices are moot. They can’t be made any longer, for the situation never will be the same. A similar selection of choices may present itself in a similar situation, but any choice we make causes change and turns the way things are into the way things were. Many people, though, spend a great deal of time and energy in regret, wishing that they had made a different choice somewhere along the line, wishing that they hadn’t chosen the course of action that they chose.
They don’t realize, though, that the only way to deal with any choices that we’ve made is acceptance. The choice has been made, now deal with the consequences–don’t regret the choice. Of course, if our choice was ill-advised or if it caused pain or anguish to yourself or others, we shouldn’t just shrug our shoulders and say “oh, well.” We need to learn from it, and we need to direct our energy towards dealing effectively with the consequences, and not direct our energy towards feeling bad or feeling sorry for ourselves.
We also can’t let one or two–or even ten or twenty–bad choices keep us from making choices in the future. Accept the fact that some choices have turned out badly, but learn from those choices and move on. The person who won’t enter into another relationship because of the person or persons who treated them badly before doesn’t realize that he or she made a choice to be with that other person, and that instead of sabotaging their future happiness, they should learn from the error and focus on choosing to be with people who will treat them better.
Don’t let yesterday’s choices hurt your today and your tomorrow. Don’t let your fear of choices prevent you from making effective ones. Accept that you will make mistakes, and make sure you’re ready to deal with any consequences of your choices or actions. We all face choices every day, and billions of people make billions of decisions every day, but billions of people also deal with consequences–and there are many wonderful consequences to choices–every moment.
Since I have a choice tomorrow I am going to talk about Giving Weight to Choices but before I close I leave you with a few quotes on choice.
You are the person who has to decide.
Whether you’ll do it or toss it aside,
You are the person who makes up your mind.
Whether you’ll lead or will linger behind,
Whether you’ll try for the goal that’s afar.
Or just be contented to stay where you are.
Edgar Guest
The greatest power God gave us is the power to choose. We have the opportunity
to choose whether we’re going to act or procrastinate, believe or doubt,
pray or curse, help or heal. We also choose whether we’re going to be happy
or whether we’re going to be sad.
Lou Holtz
I say to you make a choice today and allow the choice to be one that makes certain your Life Is Simply Good. In the meantime I must visit some blogs and leave a few compliments. I urge you to do the same but first I urge to go check out this wonderful blog, The Complimenting Commenter. This blog was developed to compliment people through their comments and I must say a great job is done. One of the goals CC had for the summer was to recruit 100 other bloggers to also go out into the world and deliver 100 compliments during the summer. As of today 98 people, have stepped up to the plate, come on I would love for two of my readers to step up to the plate. Do I know who CC is, no but I am a friend and one who has stepped up to the plate for I believe in spreading a little joy around. So go here now and become a commenter. Each one of you are beautiful and special to me.
July 20th, 2005 at 1:14 pm
Hey girl another post right on target! Some where in scripture it says “be hot or cold but not lukworm!” Have a wonderful day !
July 20th, 2005 at 3:34 pm
Sometimes, Victoria, I almost think you’re sitting across from me and giving me this advice.
July 20th, 2005 at 4:19 pm
I think you wrote this one for me today. What an excellent post !! I am going to check out CC. I might step up to the plate !!
*HUGS*:heart::yes:
July 20th, 2005 at 5:16 pm
Yeah, that sure is one of the major categories of mental clutter - regretting thngs that are over and done. Learning from the past is different from dwelling on it.
Thanks for the link! I will be reciprocating, but some weeks from now - I have to bug “sis” to do that for me, since I’m barely technically knowledgable enough to operate an electric can opener…
July 20th, 2005 at 5:47 pm
Another fantastic and inspirational post. Choices are ours to make good and bad. We always have a choice, either sink or swim, be kind or unkind, etc.
Love ya! *HUGS*
July 20th, 2005 at 6:37 pm
Don’t ya just love that freak’n banana??
July 20th, 2005 at 6:49 pm
I’ve lived to regret many choices made in the past, but you are absolutely right - we cannot dwell on things that are over and finished. We must move on even when it seems impossible. God Bless.
July 20th, 2005 at 8:43 pm
Hey Victoria,
Thanks for stopping by and leaving a compliment. I think I’d like to join the complimenting club. What a nice idea. Have a great day.
July 20th, 2005 at 9:18 pm
Well said. Choices have to be made sometimes and they are bad and we know them at the time but just the same they are the choices we made and possibly the the only choice afforded to us.
They are also a leasson in life.
I have made some bad ones in my past and you know what, I don’t regret them becauswe I learned and given the chance to go back and change them….. I would do it the same again because I am the person I am today because of them.
Have a nice day.
July 20th, 2005 at 9:35 pm
Knowing that we can actually choose how to react or to feel gives us that much more freedom and confidence, doesn’t it? Vickie I joined the Summer of 2005 Complimenting Challenge over at the Complimenting Commenter’s blog early on, and it is a fabulous feeling! Just an hour or so ago I was over there and it looks like we’ve made the 100 mark!! Be well my friend!
July 20th, 2005 at 10:00 pm
I must say that you pushed us over the top. Thanks for the support and the positive outlook.
July 20th, 2005 at 11:24 pm
Hello good woman!
Again another outstanding and much needed post!
As per your request here are your questions. ( don’t forget to post the rules too!!!)
1) If you could be a plant that cured every disease known to man, what would your name be?
2) If you could make a new fruit, what would it taste like, what color would it be, texture? describe it fully..
3) If you were a flea what animal would be your preffered host?
4) If you could change one thing about the world today what would it be and why would you change it?
5) You spoke of choices, what is one choice that you would remake if you were given the chance?
Smooshes:)
July 20th, 2005 at 11:31 pm
Let me speak my heart out on this. I have been making choices under societal and many other compulsions like keeping others happy. Of course I have been regretting. Similarly I have seen many make bad (uncalculated) choices. They would not listen when suggested the alternative. Result: remorse and regret in life. You say don’t let it hurt. How? How?
Thanks for bringing this up. Keep on, on this subject.
July 21st, 2005 at 5:14 am
Right on target, as per usual
July 21st, 2005 at 8:34 am
Ahhhh…choices! Every movement we make in life, involves one. What a nice post{!}, where I am reminded of many things, most importantly that “what was” is no more; but I have the power to choose wisely next time. Sometimes choices are made becasue we were lied to or mis-informed. Those are the ones that have hurt me the most. ~I send Hugs and Love your way..Thanks for Being!~
July 21st, 2005 at 1:37 pm
Hello Vickie. In all honesty, I cannot say I have lived in regret. I may have thought about a certain situation and wished I had done something differently, but I have fortunately never regretted a choice I made. Life is too short to live with regret. I try to move on as quickly as I can and make the best of my life at the time.