We have all heard the term said that “some days must be dreary.” I’ve spent many some time my life searching for positive, encouraging, and inspirational ways to live my own life; I’ve spent uncounted amount of hours studying and talking to people and watching films, trying to establish a healthy perspective in my life; I’ve tried hard to put all of what I learned into practice in my life, so that I might be fully aware of how beautiful life is and can be but I also have shared it because it has helped me. Yet the dreary days strike, and they strike hard when they do. And there’s nothing that I can do about it–for some days must be dark and dreary and I call them the Rainy Days.

The Rainy Day

The day is cold and dark and dreary;
It rains, and the wind is never weary;
The vine still clings to the moldering wall,
But at every gust the dead leaves fall,
And the day is dark and dreary.

In the midst of the dreary days, it’s very difficult to keep perspective. I know that with me, my mind takes off on its own, creating new problems out of the current ones, making me feel horrible about things that haven’t even happened, as if I didn’t feel bad enough already. I lose sight of the beauty of life, and I can focus only on the negative, the hurtful, the hopeless. To make things even worse, I start to get down on myself during these times, for I know that I’m causing much of the problem myself, allowing my thoughts to turn a minor problem into a major catastrophe–and it’s all in my mind. I have many so do other people, some with problems worse than mine and some less than mine– the key is all in the perspective of things and just how I choose to deal with them. Do I want to stay down in the muck, not allowing me to see the bright blue sky and the beauty that is always there around me?

My life is cold and dark and dreary;
It rains, and the wind is never weary;
My thoughts still cling to the moldering past,
But the hopes of youth fall thick in the blast,
And the days are dark and dreary.

It’s tempting to say that these times also try my faith, but I know that these times cause me to turn my back on my faith. (I have to take responsibility for doing that–”the times” don’t cause anything.) I feel that I don’t have any strength left to go on, to keep fighting, yet my faith and I can do anything. My situation makes me feel alone, unloved, and isolated, yet with my my faith I am always cared for, loved and supported. The negative thoughts tell me that the situation will turn out disastrous, yet my faith assures me that all will turn out for the best. But my me focusing on the dark and dreary days this doesn’t allow me to see the light, and it doesn’t allow me to feel the hope that constantly should be a part of my life.

Be still, sad heart! and cease repining;
Behind the clouds is the sun still shining:
Thy fate is the common fate of all:
Into each life some rain must fall,
Some days must be dark and dreary.

“Be still, sad heart!” What wonderful words these are. They aren’t the trite, “you should be happy” words that so many people offer. They acknowledge the sadness, the hurt, the darkness, but they encourage stillness and peace. “Behind the clouds is the sun still shining”–these words say basically tell me “I believe in the sun, even when it doesn’t shine; I believe in my friends, even when they’re not here; I believe in faith, even in rough times and most difficult times when I am not aware of it.”

And that brings up something. I love the rain just as much as I love the sun. We need the rain as we need the sun, think about it even in the some aspect of the dreary days: in some strange, frightening way, I like them. Something inside of me feeds off of them, like some sort of parasite that grows stronger and stronger with each bit of negativity and sadness that goes into it. And it seems to feed off itself, too–the stronger I make it by feeding it my negativity, the more negativity it sends back out to me, and I accept that and feed it right back into it. Can you imagine if we would all take this and try to use it in people which I really do and try and find good some good in every person what the world would be like?

So, what do I do about this? Well, right now I’m in a dreary day, and I’m writing this . I believe the best thing I can do for myself is to regain a sense of perspective, to view things once again realistically, to remind myself of just how wrong many of my feelings are. I have to recognize that even though I’m telling myself that I’m not strong enough to take something, and that I have no one to turn to, in all actuality there are quite a few people I could call who would be more than willing to sit down with me and talk things through without judging me. But I have to call them–I can’t wait for them to see that something’s wrong and offer their support. Most people, I included, when they see someone suffering assume that the person wants or needs time alone if that person doesn’t ask for help. There are people there for me–I am not alone. None of us are, no matter how much we like to try to convince ourselves that we are during our rainy days.

Once I’ve recognized the feelings that I can honestly describe as wrong, I can work to shift my perspective about them. This does take work, though–and it’s not at all easy work. The feelings inside of me are trying to convince me that they’re right–my brain is telling me that they’re wrong, but my heart is trying to convince me that they’re right. And my brain and heart don’t always see eye to eye.

These things remind me that humor is very important in our lives, and that once we lose humor, the risks to our selves is very great indeed. My dreary days are characterized in part by a complete loss of humor, and a bit of laughter goes a long way towards restoring the brightness in my life.

Try to keep in mind always–without the rain of gloomy days, the flowers wouldn’t grow and the rivers and lakes, sources of so much life and beauty, would dry up. And if life didn’t give me a load of crap every now and then, I’d have nothing to fertilize my garden with. Plants would bear weak and tasteless fruit without fertilizer and water, and there’s no reason to believe that I’m all that different. Life holds me in its hand, if I let it. And the rainy days help me to grow, if I let them.

That the birds of worry and care fly above your head, this you cannot change. But that they build nests in your hair, this you can prevent.

Chinese Proverb

Happiness is intrinsic, it’s an internal thing. When you build it into yourself, no external circumstances can take it away.

Leo Buscaglia

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Update on my Mom—–She was admitted to the hospital on Friday afternoon with Unstable Insulin Dependent Diabetes and Urinary Tract Infection

Easy Pecan Pie

3 Eggs (beaten)
1 cup Sugar
1/2 cup Dark Corn Syrup
1 tsp. Vanilla Extract
6 tbls. Butter or Margarine (melted and cooled)
1 cup Pecan Halves
1 (9 inch) Unbaked Pie Shell

In a large bowl, beat eggs, sugar, corn syrup, vanilla and butter.
Stir in pecans.
Pour into unbaked pie shell.
Bake in preheated oven at 350 degrees for 45 to 60 minutes or until knife
inserted halfway between outside and center comes out clean.
Cool on wire rack.

“Things You’ll Never Hear at Always Victoiria nor Hear a Southerner Say”

“I’ll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex.”

Duct tape won’t fix that.

Come to think of it I’ll have a Heineken.

We don’t keep firearms in this house.

Has anybody seen the sideburn trimmer?

You can’t feed that to the dog.

I thought Graceland was tacky.

No kids in the back of the pick-up, it’s not safe.

Wrasslin’s fake.

Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace?

We’re vegetarians.

Do you think my hair is too big?

I’ll have grapefruit instead of biscuits and gravy.

Honey, these bonsai trees need watering?

Who’s Richard Petty?

Give me the small bag of pork rinds.

Deer heads detract from the decor.

Spitting is such a nasty habit.

I just couldn’t find a thing at Wal-Mart today.

Trim the fat off that steak.

Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.

The tires on that truck are too big.

I’ll have the arugula and radicchio salad.

I’ve got it all on a floppy disk.

Unsweetened tea tastes better.

Would you like your fish poached or broiled?

My fiance, Paula Jo, is registered at Tiffany’s.

I’ve got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.

Little Debbie snack cakes have too many fat grams.

Checkmate.

She’s too old to be wearing that bikini.

Does the salad bar have bean sprouts?

Hey, here’s an episode of “Hee Haw” that we haven’t seen.

I don’t have a favorite college team.

Be sure to bring my salad dressing on the side.

I believe you cooked those green beans too long.

Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Darla.

Elvis who?

By the way my sister and I have not slapped each other nor have we had a cross word with each other we both have put aside any differences we may have and agree that our mother comes first. This we did in front of our mom hugged and kissed as we did when we were knee high and would fight with hope it will help mom who even told her physician that HER GIRLS differences would drive her crazy and was very stressful. Thanks for all who are keeping us in your thoughts and prayers. If anyone wants to send an elderly lady a cheery card drop me a note and I will send you her address privately. Thanks my friends